After all the hype and build up to the birth of the twinions, I distinctly remember Mr Surfer and I looking at each other completely baffled as if to say, “So…what the fark now?”
Tell me which new parent hasn’t had the same look?
But you know for us, having two in one hit – as it were – added that extra pressure of ramping up the responsibilities and duties of a parent.
We were so clueless, we left it completely to the midwives at the NICU to direct us.
Breastfeeding, nappy changing, swaddling, bathing. Those midwives were like the Michelle Bridges and the Commandos of antenatal care. Strict, firm, giving instructions with an iron fist.
After 16 days of parenting boot camp, we were finally able to take the boys home.
We thought we had it down pat. In fact, dare I say, to the point of being cocky.
Tandem twin breastfeeding on little or zero sleep? Not. A. Problem.
Didn’t take long for reality to sink in, though.
Thus, the blunders began. And oh my, there were some beauties.
Anna Funder is an accomplished author and award-winning novelist. I haven’t read a single one of her books and truth be told, probably never will.
But she is a mother who has a hilarious childhood story about her own.
Camping in Yosemite National Park with family, she desperately needed to go to the toilet situated deep in the woods. As her breastfeeding mum was kinda tied up with her little baby brother, she instead gave Anna instructions on how to get there.
Adamant there was a bear down there, Anna didn’t want to go on her own.
But her mum persisted, telling her there was no such creature.
Until an irate adult brought Anna back, wondering who was the irresponsible parent who kept sending their 6 year old to the shower blocks alone?
There was a BEAR down there!!!
This story made Anna come up with the most awesome Mama Mantra I’ve discovered since entering this crazy gig called parenting:
“I tried my best, it wasn’t enough but it could’ve been worse”
So, I’ve thought about mine.
For all the times I’ve clipped the inside of my boys’ legs with their seat belt or almost scalded their mouths with overheated expressed breast milk and for all the future faux pas awaiting ahead:
“I WILL survive this. And one day, I’ll even laugh about it”
What’s your mantra? What’s been one of your epic parenting blunders?
Did your mum make you go down to the toilets when there was a bear down there?

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