It’s a safe bet to say that those who say that raising twins is just the same as raising 2 children “close” in age don’t have twins of their own.
Take for example, toilet training.
Having the twinlets as very different individuals and personalities, the “High Five”, squeeze-a-brown-shark-out-get-a-toy technics have only worked for one.
The other insists that doing his business is no one’s business.
And that’s fine. We’re happy to go along with Nunu and when he’s good and ready to make the transition from Lightening McQueen Pull ups to Thomas the Tank undies, we’ll readily be there.
I took the boys to their favourite park the other week.
All was going smoothly when K-Bear insisted he needed to go to the toilet. Having just been to do a discreet wee outside the park fence 5 minutes earlier, I knew he was talking about dropping the brown bomb.
Logistics can be a real bitch at times like these. Trying to drag the other twin to come along was not only tough, but time crucial.
Crossing his legs, K-Bear desperately cried, “Mama…poo, poo!”
Finally, I was able to convince Nunu to get down from the equipment to follow his brother, albeit begrudgingly. I don’t blame him. Would you give up the slide to watch your brother take a crap?
I took the boys back to the quiet corner just outside the park. Legs spread wide in a perfect yoga triangle pose, K-Bear started to do his business.
Realizing that I somehow needed to clear up the mess, I pulled out the baby wipes and made a little nest where the poo could land.
Despite the few flies we attracted, all was going as well as could be expected.
Then, I noticed that up the road – 10 cars away from mine – a parking ranger was doing the rounds. I suddenly panicked realizing that I hadn’t put in any money in the meter. If I didn’t take drastic action, I was going to be slapped with an $88 parking ticket.
“Finished, sweetie???” I failed at trying to sound calm.
“No, Mama…”
More flies started gathering.
“Shoo fly!” K-Bear said, slightly distracted.
“Sweetie, are you finished, NOW???”
My boys are only 3 but they’re not stupid. They knew their mum was frantic.
While his brother plopped away, Noah was still playing near by but was starting to get agitated and impatient.
With my eyes darting back and forth, surveying my son’s poo situation and seeing that the dreaded parking man was only 10 metres away from my car, I knew I was done for.
“Okay, Mama. Finished!”
Quickly I scrambled up the bark and the soiled wipes, trying to wrap it into a neat parcel. Then, wiping my boy’s bum in Olympic record time, I swung our massive back pack around my shoulders, bolted to the bin to then head for the parking meter.
Not even thinking about my boys, they started running behind me.
I looked like Dora the Explorer with her own little troop of Boots and Diego, running behind her.
Vamanos!!!
“Mama, wait for me! Wait for me!” the boys cried out.
For any innocent by passer, I surely would’ve looked like a fugitive, crazy mum, escaping double trouble.
Still ignoring the twinlets’ cries to slow down, I made it to the parking meter just as the nasty parking ranger booked the car in front of me.
Crisis averted.
But damn it. I wasn’t so lucky the following week…
Gah!
Joining Essentially Jess for IBOT
Would take the poo over the parking ticket any day – which makes me concerned about my priorities…
Lydia C. Lee recently posted..First of the Month Fiction – May
Oh no! I am laughing and cringing at the same time. You deserve a medal lady. I am happy to report that with slightly older kids the toileting logistics are getting easier – slightly.
Mumabulous recently posted..Is Your Blog You?
It wasn’t that long ago that I would jump on line to research the nearest toilets and parents room everywhere I took Miss 2.5. Now she asks me to leave the room so she can have “privacy”. What she really means is can you leave the room so I can pull all the toilet paper off the role.
Kevin recently posted..Is it time for your blog to grow up?
This story is definitely a keeper to tell the kids in the future! :p
Ai Sakura recently posted..30 Before 30 | Update for April 2013
Oh this is funny, I didn’t avert my ticket either – don’t unhate them? I wrote a post about poo in my old blog – it seemed to rule my life for a while, nothing is the whole world but a poo would make me late for work … Just as we were leaving home … You mamanged it well grace, kimx
Kim recently posted..Backing your dreams
oh no!! My daughter took forever to toilet train – in the end I just let her get ready in her own time (about 3yrs and 3 months) by the time she was ready to say YES I need to go. Now we have conquered the fear of the public toilet (took about 5 months and a trip out with one of her friends who was toilet trained) to finally make her sit on the public toilet seat!
My son is about to turn 2 in 2 weeks. He only started walking at 22.5 months and tells me he needs to go more and more.. but its usually 5 minutes after he tells me that he goes – and by then he is bored of the potty and runs off.. I am not sure I am ready for him to toilet train.. but I think he is!
Yvette @ Little Bento Blog recently posted..Leftover Crusts – Part One
oh what a pooy situation you were in. lol. I can’t say that has ever happened to me but I feel for you. Toilet training here in this house is still going and i think my almost 2 yr old will toilet train before her 4 yr old sister is.
Salz recently posted..City driving
aww, what a story, good on you for making it back in time, the image of you running like Dora made me giggle over my morning cuppa. Thank you for sharing!
And what a bummer about the following week, those parking inspectors dont miss a beat!
Kate @Crazy Crunchy Chocolate Mummy recently posted..W is for. . . Weekly wisdom
OMG that was almost a very expensive poo. I often think our husbands wouldn’t believe the logistics of just getting through a day sometimes.
Rachel @ The Kids Are All Right recently posted..The Cinnamon Challenge
Ha Ha, I love that ‘would you get off the slide to watch your brother take a crap!!’
Well when you put it like that. . . .
Sorry about the ticket – bummer.
rhian @melbs recently posted..Rocking it out!
Whoa! Close call! Well done (on that occasion!)
We are mid-toilet-training with our twins and it’s not just double as much work at having one, it’s quadruple!! Do you find that? If one decide he needs to go down to brown-town the other thinks he might like a sit on the loo too, for novelty value. Half an hour later the second twin will actually need to go, and the first twin will want a sit too, just cos. I’ve never spent so much time in the toilet, turns out its SUCH a small room!
Nat @ Natalia familia recently posted..Yoga :: with the whole family
what a crackingly funny story to tell Grace – not the parking ticket park – they are awful – but the poo and the Dora and the running – I could picture it all perfectly xx
Josefa @always Josefa recently posted..An Art party, with The Flash
Kids ARE all so different when it comes to toilet training – good on you for accepting each of your twinlets just the way they are. And how funny – though I’m sure it wasn’t at the time!!!!
Visiting from #TeamIBOT xxx
Janet recently posted..Changing Views on Tattoos
Damn parking tickets! We have had one when living on the Sunshine coast (QLD) when going out for lunch.
Ended up being a very expensive lunch date – and I love the Poo story. Kids and Poo’s always end up with good stories to share 🙂
Lisa Wood recently posted..Munching Monday :: French Toast Faces
You poor thing. Great story Grace. We have what I call ‘toilet dramatics’ with our 3 year old who insists on riding his bike to the toilet (through the house) or pushing our small suitcase to the toilet, every time (in other words the journey, the excursion is extremely important). I have no idea how I would handle two! Glad you have a funny story to tell without a ticket, shame about the other time.
Kathy recently posted..18 years to life
That could have been a very expensive #2!! I’m impressed with your ingenuity – a nest with wipes? I never would have thought of that!
Née recently posted..Stuff happens
OH CRAP!!!!! Toilet training is possibly the most soul destroying thing I’ve come across – and while I’ve d0ne 2 of them, I’ve still got 1 to go!! Thanks for the giggle G xxx Em
Emily @ Have a laugh on me recently posted..Nothing reeks of desperation more than a beer in your handbag!
Ha ha! That’s hilarious! I can just see you doing this whole thing!
I remember when I was expecting Ava, I decided to wait to toilet train BJ, cause I didn’t want to have to do the toilet run with a new born. Typical kid, decided that wouldn’t work for him, so he toilet trained himself a month before she was born. I was torn between exultation and devastation!
EssentiallyJess recently posted..Blogging: IBOT Style
bahaha, this post made my day. I am dreading toilet training and think I will confine myself to the house till both babies are school bound
Elise recently posted..Port Stephens and the Big Move
Oh man, I fee your pain about getting the other twin to come along for a potty break in the midst of playing. That, my friend, does get better. It takes a while though. Also – just keep that parking ticket and put it under your windshield all the time. They’ll think they already nabbed you!
Bridget recently posted..How Dad’s Do Advice
Oh Grace, I’m sorry for laughing at your misfortune, but this is hilarious!!
I remember how frustrating toilet training was, and can’t even imagine having to do it twice for two different little personalities around the same time.
Thank goodness you didn’t get the ticket, but bad news for the next one 🙁
Lisa xx
Lisa@RandomActsOfZen recently posted..A to Z of ZEN. O is for…..
Oh no… I’m sorry but I’m just laughing now!
Rita recently posted..What I have been up to in my blogging break and other updates
You have got to love a good poo story, lol.
My Miss 3 was with me at the local strip of shops and said she needed to do a wee, we were a 1 minute drive from home and she insisted that she had to go now and would not get in the car, so strategically opening 2 doors of my car and sheltering her with my body I allowed her to wee in the gutter. But that all turned pear shaped when a little bit of poo came out. Then it was screw the sheltering of the child I had to find wipes so started rummaging around the car and finally clean up the child and throw her in the car without stepping on the tiny nugget in the gutter. Mortified.
Rachael @ Fit Fab Forty recently posted..The week that was – getting moving
OMG. I have to be honest – I have NEVER been in that situation. Many to rival it, but this particular one is definitely unique. As is pooing under a tree (LOL). Shit. (literally).
Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit
Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit recently posted..Day 1306 – Kale
OMG Grace – I’m giggling… only because I’ve had so many ‘bush poos’ of my own to contend with. The worst? When there are no wipes…… xx
kim@FallingFaceFirst recently posted..I can’t believe it’s not Better
OH my gosh this made me LAUGH!!! I have a couple of major poo dramas under my belt too!! x
Robyn (Mrs D) recently posted..My interview with one of Australia’s leading dieticians, Melanie McGrice, on ‘Nutrition for children under 5’
Again, I shouldn’t laugh at this but I just can’t help myself. Karma is gonna get me for sure, and she’ll be covered in poo!
Kylez @ A Study in Contradictions recently posted..Quotable Notable
I just nearly peed myself. Bloody took me right there with you. I could smell the crap and everything! Bwah ha ha.. Shooo flies!
I know the dragging the other twin to take a dump part is painful but not the parking meter on his way one. I so would have loved to have been one of those flies just to have seen you running for the parking meter! Bwah ha ha
Penny recently posted..Finding Animals in Clouds
This just made me spit chocolate ALL OVER my keyboard. Good God I can relate …. not to the twins bit – hell no I take my hat off to you there, but you just brought back so many memories of me sitting on the floor of toilets asking “Have you finished yet” whilst I worry about my loaded shopping cart waiting for me back in the healthy and beauty aisle of Coles. xx
Sonia Life Love Hiccups recently posted..My Family’s Crazy Photoshoot – Capturing Precious Memories
Eighty-eight dollars?! Guess they hang you high and dry in Australia, too. As a good judge once told me, “Fight every Goddamn ticket!”
Nami recently posted..Here She Is