I try to be careful when talking about racism.
It’s a precarious balance in objectively pointing out the lack of cultural and racial tolerance that still exists in Australia and mistakenly sounding like another disgruntled “hard done by” Asian Australian.
Last Friday night I decided to take up what this fine city had to offer and bought myself a ticket to a Sydney Writers Festival production called, “Stories Then and Now”
A line up of 6 Asian Australian storytellers, all had their riveting stories of family and lineage as well as the hard journey each of them took to make Australia their home.
Despite an almost a full auditorium, the setting was still intimate.
30 years ago, migrant stories like these would never have been of anyone’s interest. Least of all in same height of popularity it was that night.
And it’s significant moments like these, as a nation, we’re heading in the right direction towards multi-culturalism.
We’re having the open discussions, reaching understanding and acceptance of different ethnic backgrounds.
There’s now a listening, attentive audience who want to learn about and appreciate the hardships and challenges that migrant Australians undertook to get here.
Whether it be candidly or formally, we’re talking. Educating each other.
There’s lots of mixed views about last Friday night’s AFL match between Collingwood and Sydney Swans.
(Image from Zoey Martin)
There are those who feel Adam Goodes has been deservedly commended in how he handled the racial slur. Others believe that the 13 year old girl who called him an “ape” was treated too harshly by authorities and security and that she became an scapegoat.
The fact is that the incident was exposed and dealt with accordingly.
20 years ago, this wouldn’t have happened.
Because, for someone who has been racially vilified on many an occasion, I cannot stand complacency.
When I tell someone about being subjected to racism, the last thing I want to see is a shrug of the shoulders and hear the line, “Well, it happens everywhere, not just in Australia.”
That’s just not good enough. Especially when it’s happening to me in my own country.
There is the argument that what happened shouldn’t even be a racist issue because the 13 year old girl didn’t think that calling someone an “ape” was being racist.
If that is the case, then all the more reason we need to talk openly; have those difficult conversations about what racism is to someone who has experienced it.
As Zoey Martin eloquently put it:
“Let’s allow victims of racism to define what is racist and what is not.”
The more we talk about it, educate our children and ourselves, the more we can nut out the sensitivities, the intricacies of social and racial tolerance.
We’re finally at a stage where, as a developing multi-cultural nation, this is actually happening.
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Zanni Louise says
Absolutely Grace. Education is everything. I inherited my hopefully non-racist views from my mother, so I think we can really influence each other and draw the line when something is not ok. x
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Sabeen says
Briliantly articulated Grace. As a muslim of Pakistani origin, I have experienced a number of incidents/comments which are completely unacceptable, in saying that though, I agree with you that there has been a major shift over the past couple of decades, people have become much more tolerant, welcoming and warm. People are actually willing to learn and acknowledge multiculturalism, a great way forward.
On another note, so jealous you got to go to a SWF event, if this subject interests you, you might want to acquire a copy of “Joyful Strains” – collection of memoirs of passage and arrival into Australia. { This may be a shameless plug for my bestie who’s story is also featured in the book} 😉
Have a wonderful day xx
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mamagrace71 says
Sounds like a book I’d definitely be intereted in, Sabeen! Will have to look it up!
Laticia says
I love packages in the mail! It arrived while I was out of town and I was so excited to get home and open it! The fabric scraps are adorable and I ablsluteoy love the cozy! It is perfect!!! Thanks again!
https://www.gamecoins.pro/ says
Not. She need to put some clothes on. We all know that sex sells, but damn. Also, the girl can sing, why not show her talent. She really should just do a ballad. Cuz no one’s going to take her serious with this track.
Lydia C. Lee says
When a whole lot of racism appeared on twitter after the release of Olympus has fallen (it’s a movie, stoopids!), Daniel Dae Kim tweeted “We can do better – We must do better” or something along those lines. (He then of course had to explain he meant that it was about the racism, not beating up Koreans but well, what can I say).
I actually think Goodes has behaved impeccably – and could have been justified to react differently, but he’s raised the question about how does a 13 year old learn that behaviour? And that falls on everyone.
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mamagrace71 says
Good point you raise, Lydia. I guess environment plays a big part in what people perceive is acceptable social behaviour. And I agree that it falls on everyone to teach our children what that is…despite being in rural or urban areas.
kirri says
I’m interested in hearing your thoughts on positive ways we can help our children in becoming less racist? We don’t actually talk about race in our house. We foster interest in lots of different cultures, both abroad and in Australia, but unless someone brings it up (e.g.., one of my daughters best friends is Filipino and talks about her family, different skin color and traditions quite a bit), we don’t focus on it.
We choose to highlight the similarities between all Australians, rather than the differences.
I figure that the girls will develop their own way of assimilating this information as they grow – but I don’t really know what the ‘best practices’ might be….maybe something you could address in another blog post Gracie?
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mamagrace71 says
I can definitely do a follow up with some suggestions on positive ways to help our children but for me and my childhood experiences, I will be talking a lot of “from the gut” You know stuff that’s more instinctive…to me.
I guess there are no hard set rules but I think starting to talk about what these might be or what they could possibly look like…can only be a good thing, right?
Katyberry says
Thanks Grace. I don’t think about racism a lot. I don’t have to because it doesn’t generally affect me or my loved ones. But I love my footy, I love the Swans, and I think Goodesy is amazing, so I certainly had plenty of opportunity to reflect on Friday night.
Adam Goodes’ reaction to the slur was do real and visceral that it took my breath away, and made me feel pain for him, as it happened, and before we even knew the details. A strong man, a leader on and off the field, to have it all brought back to a judgement on the colour of his skin, really opened my eyes to what people of colour must be made to feel all the time. It shocked my senses and my complacency.
mamagrace71 says
You know, Katy, I started following him on FB after the incident! The first AFL player I’ve ever taken an interest in! (My husband will be bummed that it wasn’t someone from Carlton :)).
But it’s so interesting to hear that the footy match has helped you open your eyes to racism. That can only be a good thing!
Shari says
So well written, Grace and so true – this is the stuff we need to talk about and educate on. Regarding the weekend’s events I think it’s entirely decided by Adam Goode’s perception and not the 13 year old’s intent. If it’s perceived as being racist and offensive then it is. Full stop. There’s a lesson in this for everyone and it’s a shared responsibility to teach it. I would have loved to have been at Friday’s event sounds like it was fabulous. Thanks for a great post xxx
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mamagrace71 says
“Adam Goode’s perception and not the 13 year old’s intent” – Oh Shari, could I love you any more???! xxx
Kim @ Bachelormum Style says
I agree with you grace and I do think Australia has a way to go but we r getting there. I do though feel sorry for that girl, I don’t think she knew what she was doing and I hope it doesn’t negatively affect her long term so that it becomes an eye for an eye. Her parents are the ones who shld have been on trial, I havt seen them mentioned. Perhaps they cld on tv and explain what happened and apologise, I think that wld be a powerful message to a society more so than pointing to a young silly girl.
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mamagrace71 says
I’ve heard since that the girl’s grandma has spoken to media and she is very upset with how the MCG handled the situation. So, I have a feeling that there’s still more to the story. And again, I strongly believe that this can only be a good thing.
Ai Sakura says
It’s amazing to see where Aust is in terms of this now and I’m very pleased. My sisters experienced racist bullying in school when we lived there when I was much younger and my mum still talks about it today. Even when I was there for uni, I experienced 2 instances but I’m so glad to hear you speak that Aust is now at the stage where racism is being discussed, and more being educated. I love going to Aust and maybe one day Lil Pumpkin might go over to study too so I hope she will enjoy her experience even more there in the future
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mamagrace71 says
Hi Ai, I remember you telling me in another one of my “Australia and Racism” posts the bullying that your sisters went through. I’m so sorry to hear that.
You know, I hope that your Lil Pumpkin and my twinlets will be able to experience a far more accepting and embracing Australia.
JodiGibson (@JFGibsonWriter) says
As with everything it starts at home. We teach our children to be accepting of everyone and that everyone is equal. Sure you may not like some people you come across in life but it should never be because of the colour of their skin, race, religion or sexual preference.
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mamagrace71 says
True, Jodi. It starts at home and extends to the community, including our schools, churches and all community groups.
I would hate to think that the time my twins take up a team sport that they would be facing similar racial slurs.
Lisa says
I was interested to hear your point of view because as a white Australian growing up in a country town, I still see an underlying current of racism.To think that just because it is not happening if you personally don’t experience it is just crap. I agree that Australian individuals can be intolerant and racist at times. I do believe we are slowly changing, the younger generation are speaking out more and not tolerating this. However, I was horrified that a 13 year old girl was at the centre of all of this. I agree that families need to educate children on an ongoing basis.
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mamagrace71 says
You’re right, Lisa. The positives are that we are indeed changing, slowly. And for one who’s been waiting for this change for over almost 4 decades, I am embracing it. Better to change slowly than not at all!
Mumabulous says
Its such a fraught issue but you are dealing with it beautifully. Overt racism is (relatively) easy to shoot down when we see it but its not always so in your face and obvious. I think its natural for human beings to be suspicious of “tribes” who are different from themselves. Education and public discourse is the only way to break down these barriers.
BTW – I’m truly saddened to hear that you’ve been on the receiving end of abuse from idiots.
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mamagrace71 says
Thanks, Mumabulous. There are idiots everywhere just as there are awesome, supportive, beautiful people too. I tried to harden up from my experiences but now being a mum, I’m just concerned for what my boys will possibly face. But there is hope. Hope for substantial change.
Seana - Sydney, Kids, Food + Travel says
Oh big issue, and at least we live in a country where the idea of multiculturalism is squarely on the table. I agree with Zoey except I loathe that work ‘victims.’ So so sorry that you’ve dealt with racist abuse, all all who do. That’s crap!! Here’s to understanding, and teaching our kids about all races and all countries of the world.
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mamagrace71 says
Hi Seana, interesting that you loathe the word “victim” I would love to pick your brain sometime and find out more! x
robyn @slightly deep says
Very very well said Grace. I love that quote by Zoey too! It’s a very important issue.
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Bridget says
I don’t know anything about the incident you refer to – but racism is a huge problem everywhere. Talking about it, teaching children what it is and how to avoid it – those are really the only good solutions.
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natalia familia says
Well put Grace. Its a tough subject. People fear what they don’t understand, and not understanding another’s culture and lashing out is bullying and complete ignorance. Education is key, I agree! xx
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Robomum says
Excellent. This is a great post and an excellent quote by Zoey. Completely agree with this comment. It’s a delicate issue and education is the key to stopping it in its tracks.
It will not be eliminated in our generation, it may not be eliminated in our kids generation but I hope that by the time we have grandchildren, racism will be just another unfortunate chapter in history. We are now a very small world, after all.
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mamagrace71 says
Spot on, Robo! We are getting smaller!
Josefa @always Josefa says
A beautiful way to handle a very delicate issue Grace. I think there is so much to be gained from talking about things and educating ourselves – being open is key – we have many steps to go as individuals and as a society xx
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Janet says
Great minds think alike – funnily enough I blogged about racism yesterday – I had the post ready even before the Adam Goodes incident, but just brought it forward after hearing about all the hooha on the weekend. You can read it at https://redlandcityliving.com/racial-uproar/
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mamagrace71 says
Loved your post, Janet! You’ve inspired me to right up my own little list!
Sam Stone says
Education is definitely the key. I am teaching my kids that everyone is equal no matter their gender, race or sexual preference.
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Tahlia - the parenting files says
Education is everything. It goes beyond racism, to acceptance. Equality and everything else. I only want my children to have acceptance of everyone. We need to stop and change x
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EssentiallyJess says
I missed the whole Adam Goodes thing. It’s funny, because when people talk about things like this, it always shocks me, because I don’t see a lot of racism. But that’s probably a good thing; it should be shocking, and not tolerable
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Kylez @ A Stduy in Contradictions says
So well said Grace. Before Facebook came along it was easy for me to think that racism wasn’t as prevalent in society as it really is. Coming from an area with a a lot of multiculturalism, and going to a school with people from many races, I have never thought any differently of people who may look or dress differently to myself. It was just the way things are and were and everyone was just as Aussie as the next person. But since Facebook has come along, and now living in an area where there is not a lot of racial diversity, it’s easy to see how prevalent racism in Australia is and it’s just not right. It sickens me that a girl so young could say something with absolutely no idea of the impact her words could have. And I find it hard to blame her, it’s her parents and the adults around her that make me sad, that they have so obviously not educated their children to know and understand these things. Hopefully what happened on the weekend can serve to open up the discussion even further, to young and old people alike, and maybe one day we might see this sort of thing being relegated to the past.
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mamagrace71 says
Isn’t amazing how FB has just opened all of that up to all of us, Kylez?
I do hope the incident will become a lesson for the future. I’ve heard from my AFL fanatic husband that there’s been a few incidents in the past. Which makes me question, why was this one so highlighted? I’m of course glad that it was. Maybe it’s just a change of the times. I hope so!
Veronica@ Mixed Gems says
Well written and articulate post, Grace. Talk about it indeed. I don’t believe in being “colourblind” because people assume biases and stereotypes (even myself sometimes) and if we don’t discuss them we mayn’t even realise. And if it’s not about a personal awakening, it can be about helping someone else with their awakening. My words don’t come easy of late but I hope that makes sense. Keen to hear more of your thoughts in due course. xo
mamagrace71 says
That makes total sense, V! I know that I shunned my cultural background for a long time. It felt as though it was too embarrassing , too heavy loaded to talk about in White Australia. Maybe if I was encouraged to talk about it more, I wouldn’t have gone through that identity crisis. What a great point you made. xxx
Nami says
Discussing and educating are truly the only ways we can learn to deal with racial incidences. Even victims of racial bias can be racist themselves and that’s just as disheartening to discover. Personally, I just try to be a little less bitter rather than kill myself to be more tolerable of ignorant people.
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mamagrace71 says
Ah, maybe that’s my answer, Nami! And it’s true. No one seems to win in racism. Those who are caught in it just become bitter and angry themselves.
Rina says
Sometimes I think racism is a result of the unknown fueled with wrong information that are flying around out there. All that tend to build wrong ideas about one’s culture or religion and then come the generalization. So yes discussing and educating hopefully will erase racism eventually. Nice post Grace, as always 🙂
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Rhianna says
Wonderful post Grace. There is no place for racism, just like there is no room for sexism or judgement for beliefs and religion. We should all just be able to accept each other and get along.
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iSophie says
Certainly boils down to education and information. Also, some parents are just idiots (honestly) and the kids just follow along thinking its the normal thing to do, or think.
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Aroha @ Colours of Sunset says
I lived in the deep south of the US for 11 years. I have seen racism from all generations, and it has shocked me completely. I’ve been told “Shhhhh” when I said a little black baby was gorgeous. When I hired a black woman as a secretary at my place of work I was asked “You hired one of them!?” It was a real shock to me to hear those comments. nothing shocks me much any more, but it does disgust me, and make me embarrassed for our country. Hatred toward another human being because of their race, their gender, their sexual preference….who do we really think we are?! I hope when my son is 13 comments like that won’t even cross his mind, let alone come out of his mouth. Sounds like a great night out Grace! Let’s hope more conversations like that start happening all over the country. x
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Kathy says
Sorry to be so late in responding Grace. Your post articulated the situation so well. You are so right that it is only people who experience racism who can define what it is and I am very uncomfortable with so-called justifications people make – only a joke etc. I can only imagine that racism accumulates incidiously, so that individual actions and comments add up to a feeling of being discriminated against. In Australian society it can be the subleties that I imagine hurt the most. Our kids are adopted from China and I always want to have my eyes wide open to the world they face, but I am concious that I can never be in their skin, no matter how much I love them and want to protect them.
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Rachel @ The Kids Are All Right says
You have a right to speak up Grace. As someone on the receiving end you are who we rely on to know how we’re going as a community. Unless of course it’s splashed all over the news as it has been the past two weeks, which makes it patently clear how far we have to go. xx
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Jean says
You do need to speak up…it is for your children. You are their mother and you want them to be confident in their racial identity as half Asians. They need to be relaxed and proud about both sides of their fused racial identity –yours and your hubby. You want them to never have to defend their mother and her family, you want them to walk proudly with your family also.
You never want them to “hide” their half Asian identity now and later as adults, and give them the strength to speak out, if necessary.
The 13-yr. girl learned that remark from an adult –no mistake. The world doesn’t need to come down on her like a ton of bricks, but she is old enough to have it explained how that comment is interpreted. I hope it was her parents.
I am an aunt of 5 Chinese-Caucasian biracial nieces and nephews from 2 sisters. I also have 3 100% Chinese descent niece and nephews.