Today’s a big day in this household. We’re facing another momentous change. I’m torn between two minds as to whether I should actually be excited or just plain sad.
It’s the twinlets’ first day at daycare.
A part of me sees this as a great opportunity for me. I can truly hope for some days ahead filled with a partially freed up schedule and a chance to sort out my career. I should be ecstatic. I know I should be.
But I can’t help myself from shedding a few tears.
Because there’s that poignant question that every mother asks when she sees her once tiny babies take the next step to independence:
“Where the hell did the time go ?”
11 days old
And it’s hard to believe that at the tender age of 2, I will already be packing their lunches, dropping them off and picking them up from “school” and having “what do I need to prepare for tomorrow” conversations with the “teacher”.
Was I naive to think that I still had years before having to let my little ones go ?
Yesterday afternoon after waking from his nap, as I picked up K-Bear from his cot, we had this “moment”. We locked eyes and as we gave each other a loving look, he just leaned over and kissed me. Just like that. Without any prompting. It was precious.
And I guess that’s just the bittersweet about them growing up. They’re developing this conscious level of tenderness that can only melt your heart, yet at the same time, they insist that you let go of their hand. Or their little bodies squirm out of your arms, demanding that you to put them down so they can walk on their own.
I know they’ll be fine on their first day. In fact, I’m sure they’ll thrive.
But I know that for most of the day, I’ll be wondering: “Where did the days go ? ”
On their 2nd birthday
Those moments are what we live for right? When you are experiencing that deep sense of connection and you know they are feeling it too..mind-blowing.
That tangle of emotions…yeah, I get that too.
Thanks for tickling me with the cuteness of your babies AND making me cry xx
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We do indeed live for those moments. It’s just amazing how it all takes a nanosecond to be something so memorable and precious. xxx
The baby pic is so gorgeous. I never realised letting go started so young either. From the moment they want to wriggle away and do their own thing, it starts. I truly never knew the real meaning of bittersweet (dark chocolate aside) until I had children. xx
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Haha ! Dark Chocolate just had to make a mention, didn’t it ??? 🙂 So true, though. Motherhood does make you see clearly what bittersweet is all about. And with such depth too. I’m an emotional person as it is. But this mothering gig has had me in all sorts of sobbing moments…
Time is a curious thing Grace. It sneaks up on you and it flies out on you and most of the time, it just do it’s own curious thing.
I love spontaneous tight hugs and kisses too!
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We spend so much time wishing they would grow up and become independent, then when they do…we just sit back and cry. Well, I do, anyway. Never to take these beautiful moments (especially the spontaneous hugs and kisses) for granted again !
It’s always hard to drop them off at daycare that first time. Before you know it you’ll be dropping them off at their first day of high school 🙁
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OMG, B ! I’m so not there yet !!! So not there !!! 🙁
we went to look at a day care for Little Monkey yesterday and it had spots… It was far from perfect, the days they had available included Mon (which meant we’d have to pay for all public holidays and not actually use the care) and I think we won’t be taking the spot.
I hope all goes well for you. It will be much easier for them when they have each other.
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Yeah, if it doesn’t feel right (and only you can judge that), it’s not worth taking the spot. You want them to be happy where they are…
Grace – Glad to see you are blogging again yay. Hope daycare goes well for the boys – before you know it they will be breaking girls hearts!
Hey Julie !!! Happy (belated) new year ! Glad to see you found me ! The boys better not be breaking hearts…I’ll make sure they treat girls well and with respect 😀
It is pretty scary how quickly we let them go but what is even more scary is how quickly they grow up, before you know it they will be asking to borrow the car!
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