Raising bilingual children Archives

Right from the start, we knew we had a very unique opportunity in raising bilingual kids.

And while it was all very exciting (especially for Mr Surfer) at first, the reality is that having only one parent speak the second language does add extra responsibility and pressure for said parent.

For the purpose of this post, let me clarify that the term ‘bilingual’ can be wide and varied. Just as ‘fluent’ can be perceived in different ways. However, for me and my family and for now, it simply means to be able to converse and comprehend in another language.

The twinions are picking up Indonesian at an alarmingly fast pace. Their vocabulary is around 100 words, they know how to count to 10, they know about a dozen songs by heart and now they’re stringing sentences together. It’s kinda scary.

They’re becoming so confident, they correct their linguistically impaired father with his pronounciation:

“No Papa. Not ‘Sepe-DA’ (Bike). It’s ‘SE-peda”

During a drive (where I was absent), K-Bear asked his father what ‘house’ was in Indonesian. Catching his father by complete surprise, K-Bear was not satisfied with the “I’m sorry, I don’t know” answer.”

Throughout the entire 20 minute trip, he screamed from his back seat, demanding his father tell him. Right. NOW!!!

Below are some tips for raising bilingual kids when only one parent speaks the second language. It’s all based on experiences, trial, error and the occasional tantrum. (And they’re just the ones from me).

1. Talk to them in the language as much as you can from early on.

From Day 1 in NICU, I would hold the twins and sing to them all the Indonesian nursery rhymes my mother sang to me. Then, when it was just us 3 at home and they were tiny tots, speaking to them in Indonesian felt somewhat strange. Was it soaking it? Was it making any difference? Was I better off talking to a wall?

2. Use resources that work for you.

Books:

We have scoured high and low for books in Bahasa Indonesia and bought a couple from Amazon.com and Asia Bookroom. However, it’s now just easier (and cheaper) to ask my relatives to send some over. It’s generally a hit and miss as some books are too wordy or just too old for them. But we’ll just keep building that library. Just in case.

DVD’s:

We came across a fantastic language DVD resource on a website called Dinolingo.com.

We searched “Bahasa Indonesia for kids” on YouTube and these crazy, random clips of dancing dinosaurs and hippos in balloons appeared…speaking in Indonesian. The boys loved it! So, we went to the website and bought their educational pack, which consists of 5 CD’s and loads of flashcards, posters and other visual aids.

A little pricey (around $150 US) but we’ve definitely seen the value.

The packages are in other languages that aren’t too common like Swahili, Albanian, Tagalog (Filipino) and even Urdu.

Songs:

When my mum made a trip to Indonesia 2 years ago I asked her to bring back DVD’s of Indonesian children’s songs. The great thing about the DVD’s are that not only are they extremely visual, the lyrics appear at the bottom – karaoke style. There are plenty of songs (it’s a 4 DVD set!) I don’t know but because the lyrics are there, I get to learn along with the boys.

Another great educational website is Mama Lisa which has a collection of MP3’s and YouTube videos of children’s songs from all around the world.

3. Have grandparents involved

I’ve specifically asked my parents to only speak Indonesian to the twinion. In fact, over the weekend, mum decided to throw a bit of her own dialect (Batak). The boys took to it like parrots.

I happened to be in the other room when l I could hear my mum counting to 10 in Batak and the boys repeating her. My own childhood memories (especially of getting into trouble) started flowing back when I heard her tell them to “Hatop!” (Hurry up!) and “Unang!” (Don’t do that!)

When their carers at daycare ask the twinions if they’re going to visit their ‘grandparents’, they’ll promptly correct them. No, they say. They’re going to see their ‘Opung’ (Grandma) and ‘Tata’ (Grandpa).

4. Make it part of your daily schedule

When the twinions come home absolutely baked from a full on day at pre-school, we switch on DinoLingo for them to wind down while I cook dinner. So, if we haven’t spoken Bahasa all day, we make sure that there’s at least 30 minutes of it at the end of the day.

5. Fine line between encouraging and “forcing”

My twinions will tell me when they feel like talking in Bahasa and when they don’t.

We can have half an hour straight driving in the car, when the boys will enthusiastically tell me when they see a ‘pohon’ (tree), ‘rumput’ (grass), ‘awan’ (cloud) or the ‘matahari’ (sun).

But then there are moments when it’s a bilingual boycott. Don’t wanna talk. Don’t wanna converse. And that’s cool. Best to just leave it.

The twinions may, or may not keep an interest in learning Bahasa as they get older. What’s most important in exposing them to another language is that, subconsciously, they’re also assimilating into another culture. And if there’s anything they take away from all of this, I hope it’s that; an understanding of their heritage and background.

There are arguments that introducing another language causes confusion and delayed speech. I have my own thoughts about all of that. Best though, to leave it for another post.

Do you speak another language at home? What are your tips? What challenges do you face? Are there any languages you’d like to teach your child/ren?

Joining Essentially Jess for IBOT

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There’s a particular song in our weekly music class when Tim the teacher asks the students what’s their favourite food or drink. He then incorporates their chosen word and rhymes it with another into the tune.

If a child calls out “banana” he sings:

“A banana sitting on a railway track,

Feeling rather groovy,

Along came the train down the track.

Toot! Toot!

And now, it’s a banana smoothie”

Cheesy, but you know, kinda cute.

The other day, it was little Nunu’s turn to say his favourite drink.

“Susu !!!” he shouted in a loud, confident voice.

Tim suddenly stopped playing the guitar and along with the other mothers in the class, gave me a puzzled look.

“Um, he just said ‘milk’ in Indonesian…” I replied, almost in a whisper.

Tim tried to finish off the song but he was stumped. What could possibly rhyme with “susu” ?

Thanks to my cocoa brown skin, I don’t go red when embarrassed. But I don’t know why the little incident made me somewhat uncomfortable. Maybe it was all that unnecessary attention.

Perhaps it just took me by surprise. Still. That’s lame.

After all, at home we’ve made a massive effort introducing the boys to Indonesian. From the moment they were born, I sang to them the same nursery rhymes my mother taught me. Mr Surfer tracked down an Asian Children’s Bookshop on-line and we found that Bob the Builder speaks a bit of Indo too! They even boogie away to an Indonesian children’s songs CD that I downloaded from iTunes.

As I was driving back home from class, I started thinking about how I needed to change my attitude.

And I realized that being raised bi-culturally matters just as much outside as it does within the safe walls of home and family.

Whether it be at the playground or with their friends and teachers, if the boys decide to demonstrate or talk about their mixed heritage, that can only be positive reinforcements towards self-confidence. To take pride and dare to be different.

And it starts with my little boy not caring a drop that his favourite drink indeed isn’t milk but “Susu”.

Yet, I look back on my days as a migrant kid. How I loathed speaking in Indonesian. It irked me when, amongst a group of Caucasian Aussie friends, mum and dad would break out into what other’s would’ve heard something similar to little 125 CC scooters with broken mufflers.

“Aaaah, ring-a-ding-ding-diiiiiing !!!”

“Gee, Grace, your parents speak funny.”

So went the conversations.

Maybe that’s where the embarrassment stems from – all those years of being noticeably “strangely different”.

Interestingly though, not too long ago, I gave a Japanese mum a very different opinion.

Bumping into her at a local playground, I asked if she spoke to her 3 and 1 year old in Japanese. She told me it was limited to the surroundings of their home.

The rule was to stick to English when it came to the playground, fearing that others around might find it rude to hear a foreign language.

I distinctly remember telling her not to be so worried. We’re in a multi-cultural society here, I boasted.

But I was soon eating my own words.

Shame on me.

No longer can I keep listening to the abashed migrant girl within because there’s now a mother holding so much pride and elation for her two precious boys.

It’s time to celebrate, embrace and most importantly, encourage what my culturally diverse children have to offer.

P.S K-Bear, the other twin, is just as talkative in Indonesian…he just hates music class.

How do you teach your children to embrace differences ?

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My 5 tips in raising bilingual kids

Embarrassed to be bilingual