While I usually leave the Aussie Footy following to my husband, I couldn’t help turn my attention to Sydney Swans player and 2014 Australian of the Year anti-racism advocate, Adam Goodes.
He scores a goal during a Friday night match and celebrates on the field with a dance.
A war dance if you will.
Something that was inspired by the young indigenous players of the under 16’s Flying Boomerangs.
Meaningful, passionate and a nod to his indigenous background.
But it starts to intimidate people – football fans and sports commentators alike. It sends social media into overdrive and all of a sudden – his act is seen as “just too much”.
So confronting in fact that ‘continual boofhead’ Eddie McGuire suggested that Goodes should’ve given everyone a “heads up” beforehand.
Can you just see it?
In the heat of excitement in scoring a goal, a man who is so proud of how far he’s come in his career, who wants to acknowledge all those who helped him get there…
“Oh, by the way, Eddie. I’m now gonna do a bit of a dance. In a packed SCG. To be broadcasted on live prime time TV. Now, you ready???”
Just as I’m trying to recover over the lack of acceptance we have in our society, out comes the news of Caitlyn Jenner.
Beautiful and brave Caitlyn.
Overall, her welcome to the world was warm and embracing, yet, there were still the stupid snide comments.
“Of course it was photo shopped!”
“Ha! She leaves her ex wife Kris in the dust!”
“Her outfit on the Vanity Fair cover looks somewhat, Playboy Bunny-esque”
There are those who can’t seem to react beyond anything more than with casual sexism because they don’t know what else to say.
How about saying nothing?
I don’t remember the source but I once read an article where the author felt the word “tolerance” shouldn’t be used because it just sounded like a cop out; that it still allows hate or dislike to exist.
“Racial tolerance” reads “I don’t like your people or where you’re from, but I guess I can deal with you being around.”
“Transgender tolerance” reads “I really think what you’re doing is super weird and I won’t try to stop you. Just don’t get me involved.”
Personally, I think we stick with tolerance. I say, let’s use it abundantly because then when ‘tolerance’ starts to naturally roll off our tongues and in what we see, we have hope in reaching the next level: acceptance.
One article I did read and remember was written by John Pavlovitz. I don’t have the foggiest who he is other than he’s a pastor from North Carolina.
What I do know is when it comes to the importance of acceptance – not in just a passive sense – but to truly stand alongside people and celebrate with them their differences and choices, these words ring true.
“One of the greatest gifts you can give another human being is to really see them.
Not who you wish them to be, not the version of themselves that makes you the most comfortable, not the one that is the most convenient for you, but the most authentic self they can muster”
So, until everyone joins in, just keep doing your dance, Adam.
What did you think of the war dance argy bargy? What’re your thoughts on Caitlyn Jenner’s public coming out? How do you perceive the term “tolerance”?
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I have been having this discussion else where on the Vanity Fair cover. I’m glad she got the cover, and I’m all for the public coming out, as it educates us all. I am not happy with the choice of the outfit on the cover. Why couldn’t she have worn an equally alluring DRESS? Cocktail dress, evening dress – whatever? This is not to do with transgender bias. I would say the same to Oprah, Helen Mirren or Nicki Minaj. Why are females only valued if they are in a state of undress? Aren’t we worth more than that? This constant promotion is how that stupid coke in your boobs challenge become ‘normalised’ as your worth involves showing of your nakedness.
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Her outfit isn’t revealing, but it’s not a normal outfit either.
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But this is exactly what it’s about – acceptance. And if you’re going to be on the cover of Vanity Fair why go for normal when you can have sensational ? 😉
I think Caitlyn is an amazingly brave woman and I applaud her for coming out despite the detractors. Adam’s dance didn’t phase me- I think people behaved ridiculously over it and showed just how far we have to come. Great post, Grace.
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What was the issue with the Vanity Fair cover??? I don’t know who she is but that cover is gorgeous and I love that underwear and wallpaper!!
I am sick of all the hoo-ha when anyone indigenous does something cultural – so what!! I am still annoyed Cathy Freeman had her hand-smacked years back when she proudly displayed her flag at the games. Go for it I say! And on the subject of Eddie M: What a nobody anyway – who gives a frog’s butt what he thinks about ANYTHING!
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Fabulous post, Grace. I have not been able to stand Mr McGuire for a long time. If an Irish player had celebrated by pretending to do Riverdance, he would have laughed (and I know it’s far from a perfect comparison, but it’s about hypocrisy). And I think the commenter above is missing the point. It doesn’t matter what Caitlyn wore on the cover. She could have worn jeans and a t-shirt. She could have worn a burqa. The comments still would have been about looks rather than who she is and what her life will be like now.
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I love that quote from Mr Pavlovitz – he has totally nailed it. I can’t really comment on Caitlyn because I have not been following that story at all, except to say I think she looks fabulous. Absolutely fabulous. I was actually watching that AFL game (Go the Mighty Swans) and was more than a little taken aback about the fuss that unfolded. I think you nailed it in the definition department. I understand tolerance to mean, I’ll put up with those differences but I don’t necessarily like them or agree with them. Accpetance is a whole different ball game, because it’s about not just recognising the differences but embracing them too. If there was as much acceptance as there is tolerance, what a wonderful world it could be…
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I agree with you, Sammie – what a wonderful world it could be.
My husband is a Carlton supporter yet he was cheering Goodes on when he kicked and celebrated that goal.
I am all for tolerance and acceptance – for Caitlyn, Adam Goodes, everyone. I just don’t buy into debates. The only thing I thought about the outfit choice Caityln made was that it was a brave move for an older person (not ageism, just recognising that I’d be way too self-conscious).
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Yes!!! Why can’t everyone be more tolerant. I don’t really watch AFL so didnt take too much notice of the dance, but go Caitlyn! What a wonderful thing she’s done – and how many people will benefit from her honesty and feel comfortable to speak out too. Such a brave thing to do.
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I didn’t know anything about Adam doing a cultural dance. I just had to ask Jacob about it because he’s up to date with the footy. Apparently Adam was taught the dance by some kids and wanted to acknowledge them. Good on him. As for Eddie Maguire, I’ve never really liked him. His arrogance puts me off. When it comes to Caitlyn… I may be in the minority about what I think about transgender, but now that Caitlyn has emerged, she needs to be accepted by society and I hope that she feels accepted with this new season of life.
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There is nothing wrong whatsoever with Adam Goodes celebrating in a meaningful way such as he did! Eddie McGuire obviously didn’t understand what was going on and the significance of it. Does Eddie not prove of the NZ Hakka either?
The war dance by Adam was ridiculous and I thought the crowd had a right to boo. I find he often brings things back to racial when they have nothing to do with it … Be yourself .. No matter who that may ne
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But I don’t recall at any stage where Goodes suggested that it was racial – the commentators and spectators brought that up. He was doing just what you’ve stated – being himself. No matter who that may be.
My husband’s a Carlton supporter but he loved watching Goodes celebrate his goal.
The passion behind Goodes’ war dance was inspiring as was the way he addressed the media about it later. People are scared of what they don’t understand as it’s shameful that we don’t know enough about our indigenous culture.
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The word tolerance really annoys me – but I understand that often it’s an essential stop on the path to acceptance. I work in the disability sector and the word tolerance is often thrown around like it’s a good thing, but in essence it just means “I don’t like it, I don’t understand it, but I’m not going to kick off about it because that would be politically incorrect.”
Good on Goodes for doing the dance, if nothing else at least it highlighted Eddie Maguire’s boofheadedness even more.
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It’s sad world where you cannot do anything off normal without the claws coming out.
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Best quote ever: “how about saying nothing” oh, yeah! If only we humans could shut up for once…Love D xx
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I really don’t see anything wrong with him doing that dance.. especially since he’s so passionate after winning a goal.
I like Jon Stewart’s takeaway on Caitlin Jenner’s coming out that focused not just on people who accepted her, or not, but also on the sexism that all women face in life and media. Now as a woman, her looks matter the most.. not her past athletic glory or other achievements, but whether how much she looks like a woman, or how other woman compare to her. Le sigh.
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Great post Grace, I couldn’t agree more with you.
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Everyone has an opinion and we have an increasing range of platforms to express those opinions. More tolerance would be nice as would respectful debate. That unfortunately seems to be missing from both sides whenever a topic is divisive. It’s okay for us to have differing opinions, but I don’t think it’s okay to attack each other for them.
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I totally agree, Grace. Tolerance is as good as it gets. It’s unreasonable, in fact impossible, to expect everyone to love everything all of the time but it is not unreasonable or impossible to expect everyone to treat others with respect and kindness. That’s what tolerance is to me. x
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I don’t watch AFL so didn’t see the dance or hear the hoopla about it. I can’t believe people gave Adam a hard time about dancing, something that shows him being happy and celebrating his achievement. Now would he have gotten that much attention if he had started a punch up?
Good on Caitlin to come forward and tell her story. In a world where everyone is so quick to judge another (esp on social media) I think she is very brave. xx
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I like the word acceptance – that everyone is different. Quite frankly what other people do with their lives doesn’t worry me unless it impacts on mine or that of my kids. I loved the war dance! xx
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I agree, we need to stop encouraging people to be ‘tolerant’ and start being ‘accepting’ instead. It’s not hard people, come on!
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I’m over judgement at the moment. I wish people could just stop judging and be nice and welcoming and accepting. Why can’t everyone play nice?
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Adams dance didn’t worry me at all, after all how many NZ sportsman get out there each week and perform the Haka…same thing, a war dance designed to scare and intimidate…. and everyone loves it! As for Caitlyn, it’s wonderful that she has found the courage to live her life the way she has always wanted. But I have to wonder at the true intent for the photo shoot, considering the amount of money that changed hands. I sense a reality TV spin off in the works.
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That’s a great quote Grace. I do hope we can one day reach that next level of acceptance.
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I really don’t see why the “war dance” caused such an uproar, pretty sure he was just celebrating a score like all the crazy soccer players do by putting their shirts over their heads and running around like idiots. No-one seems to care about them.
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I hate the way we jump on things that seem unacceptable, so unnecessary. People worry so much about what others are doing and how it offends them when really they should worry about their own backyard. Thanks for your thoughts, Grace. x
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Great post Grace. I applaud you.
Adam Goodes is a great bloke who has done so much to give back to society. i applaud him.
Caitlyn Jenner is bringing increased awareness to transgender life which I hope will surpass tolerance and create acceptance. I applaud her.
Applause all around really.
Like lots of commenters, I don’t see the issue with the war dance either?! Perhaps people are becoming too sensitive. What about when English footballers take their shirts off and run around the pitch…are we going to start having a problem with that? It’s exhilarating for the players I’m sure when after training so hard, they score a goal and/or are winning!
As for Caitlyn, I think it’s kind of sad that in today’s day and age we have to be “brave” to choose happiness. Surely that should come naturally. I get it…I chose happiness by leaving a very unhappy marriage and I felt brave and courageous. But really, I was choosing me and that should come easily.
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Eddie just doesn’t seem to learn does he? Good on Caitlyn. Tolerance is a funny word but it’s better than intolerance I guess. I agree with you, acceptance sounds much nicer.
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