Plagued with loss, sadness and sickness, November couldn’t pass by quick enough.
In theory, this could be a post with nothing but wallow and self-pity.
But even I’m sick of hearing about my own woes.
It’s these arduous stages of motherhood when it’s almost impossible to keep the eye on the prize.
Having the twinions sick and at home on separate occasions has been an unexpected opportunity to discover how the little cogs in their heads churn.
Witnessing them rationalize thoughts; deciphering complicated emotions with their quirky individual forms of expression.
Although, I don’t want this particular era will be marked as an ominous haze. Not only do I want to remember that there were “good bits”, I don’t want to forget what they were.
There was the defining moment at bedtime, when I asked K-Bear how his day at school was. Had he missed his sick brother who had to stay at home?
“Yeah,” was his sad reply.
“Oh…”
“But I got him back, Mama. I got him back…”
Taking count of all the nights my slumber was interrupted with Nunu lying beside me in bed, kicking and digging his bony knees into my stomach.
“Nunu…stop it,” I roll over and moan.
“But Mama, I love you. I love you…”
The innocent proclaims of love humbles me.
As the early morning rays peer through the window, he contentedly smiles in his sleep and I find myself wishing I could step into his dreams, share his adventures of dinosaurs and dragons.
The thing is, I can stay resentful and frustrated with the random relentless coughing spells and the turbulent bouts of fevers that keep me up all night.
In these trying situations, I can continue to profusely demand the intangible prizes – time, freedom, autonomy – that a resigning, tired mother is so deserving of.
Surprisingly, there aren’t any.
There’s a scatter of hidden gems, instead.
To find them – to have them inconspicuously surface – is to surrender and accept the current situation. Embrace it, even.
What hidden gems have your kids helped you discover lately?
Joining Essentially Jess for #IBOT
Lucy @ Bake Play Smile says
Oh gosh your boys are just the sweetest. How lovely that they missed each other when one was home sick – so gorgeous. Fingers crossed for a whole heap of luck in December (and lots of sleep too!) xx
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kirri says
Yup. It’s all perspective G. You have some of the most adorable twin gems I have ever come across! I love hearing about the gosh-darndest cute things they say -to one another and to you xx
kirri recently posted..Self Empowering Snippets: Making peace with perfectionism
Min@WriteoftheMiddle says
Your boys are so cute Grace! Absorb every moment! Let each moment etch itself into your brain and memories. Yes, as a mum of twins myself, I know how very tiring it can all be but boy oh boy those little boys will grow up so quickly you won’t believe it. One day you will find yourself with teenagers or young adults who no longer proclaim their love for you (too embarassing) so soak it all up and recall it when you need it during those years when they tend to pull away from you a bit as they venture to the cusp of adulthood! 😉 xo
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Daisy says
Babe, those little gems are so precious and so special. I just KNOW that at some point we’re going to forget all the oppressive minutae and just remember how wonderful it was to raise our babies. I mean, that’s what all the old biddies tell me so it MUST be true!!!!
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Sammie @ The Annoyed Thyroid says
Grace, you make the cutest babies! I’m not a mum but I reckon being a mum is one of the most demanding but most rewarding jobs ever. You’re so right, it’s all about perspective but whatever your outlook, hope December positively overflows with good health good times and oodles of happiness!
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Kathy - yinyangmother says
Lovely Grace – and ogling over how cute your little guys are I miss mine all the more (sitting at work right now). I had a great day at home yesterday, just me and LIttle Yang – we swam on our own in the pool and he’s now dive bombing, somersaulting and even back-flipping (having an older sibling to teach the tricks helps heaps). He’s come so far with his swimming confidence my heart wants to burst with pride. But, as I mentioned on FB, he’s been a naughty boy, drawing with blue crayon over the carpet. In cleaning the stain, I also tried to get up some stubborn stains in his room and resorted to using nail scissors to cut out some carpet threads and he piped up ‘will the carpet grow back Mum’. Precious.
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Kylie Purtell - A Study in Contradictions says
I’ve had that feeling today. Woke up last night to find Punky soaked as Dave forgot to put a nappy on her before lights out, then woke up this morning to find Zee covered in all manner of things and doing little more than crying because she is so sick. It’s really hard some days, especially when one of them is sick, so I have to grasp the small things to get me through the day. Hope everyone is feeling better today, I’m so sorry we couldn’t make it to the park, I had everything packed and ready to go. Punky was disappointed at not being able to go so we had a little picnic in the loungeroom while Zee had a nap and I think that made up for it a little.
(Visiting on behalf of #teamIBOT today x)
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Lisa@RandomActsOfZen says
The beautiful thing is, that you keep looking for those gems, Grace. Your darling boys are so precious xx
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Dani @ sand has no home says
I really needed to read this today. We have all been sick for weeks. Your perspective is a beautiful one.
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Cybele @BlahBlah says
Man oh man dem boys are cute! Gems? Thank you for the reminder to look. I have to remember that my boy’s determination that I find so difficult right now is what got him here in the first place xxx
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Hugzilla says
LITTLE BROTHERS ARE THE CUTEST!! It’s amazing how much a cheeky smile and a cuddle can make up for. I hope that 2015 brings wonderful things for your family x
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Becky from BeckyandJames says
Beautiful post, Grace and right on time. I’ve spent the afternoon pretty annoyed at everything to the point where my children having fun was getting on my nerves. It’s all about perspective x
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Emily @ Have A Laugh On Me says
This is lovely Grace, and the sooner we can all accept this then the happier ours lives will be!
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Renee at Mummy, Wife, Me says
Beautiful post, Grace. It sure is hard sometimes. I’ve been a little frustrated tonight because I wanted to sit down uninterrupted to read IBOT posts. Miss Four has had me up and down the stairs with multiple nightmares. She asked me to lie down with her and held my hand. That in itself was a hidden gem.
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EssentiallyJess says
My kids have been driving me bonkers lately. I;m sure they are systematically tag teaming to see who can tip me over the edge first.
But then, there are lovely moments. A hand holding from a child not physically affectionate; beautiful words from a kid who doesn’t say them. Like you said, hidden gems. That make things so much better. xx
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Twitchy Sharon says
I’m sorry the twinions have been unwell. A lack of sleep brings out everyone’s evil side. I hope the coffee’s been kind to you this week x
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JodY At Six Little Hearts says
Stunning post Grace. Xx
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Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit says
Such beautiful gems you found Grace.
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Robyn says
How cute are those boys!! It’s all too easy to be swept up in life isn’t it. I am making such an effort with my little Lexi, so capture all those moments as the poor love gets dragged from pillar to post after the older twos daily activities. She makes me laugh so xx
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Alicia O'Brien says
oh you are so right. Those gems only come out when we surrender to the chaos and join in the fun 🙂
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Lisa Wood says
Sleep deprivation is the worst…..its a form of torture.
I so wished you could all get some sleep and December is a happier time for you all – I am not sure how I coped when my two younger sons were little {they were only 18 months apart} and they both had reflux so David and I hardly got any sleep.
Here is to healthy twinions, sleep and happiness.
LOVE them in the dress ups – our boys used to have babies and prams that they played with when they were younger.
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