Once in awhile, when retiring to bed, Mr Surfer and I optimise the peace and quiet and delve into a heart to heart conversation.
Another day over, bedtime seems to be most apt to assess the current household situation, iron out the bugbears but more importantly, start the groundwork conversation for future decisions.
Without the kids interrupting our train of thought or the pressures of getting through the day’s routine and errands, it’s a special opportunity to talk about our hopes, dreams and desires.
In the still of the night, speaking in gentle whispers, we discuss the twinlets’ education (private or public…I’m for public), our travel plans (an upcoming family holiday to Bali and Jakarta for the twinlets to finally meet their extended family) and our ultimate goal to spend substantial time living and working overseas (New York? Why not?).
All these talks are working towards the path of happiness for our little family.
Needless to say, I cherish these moments.
A Family Portrait is Macquarie Bank’s groundbreaking study into the attitudes and behaviours of Australian families, examining their values, hopes and dreams, big events and day-to-day challenges.
According to the research findings, “Those who discuss their hopes and dreams and financial goals are happier than those who don’t.”
And alongside politics (59%), the behavior of our relatives (56%) and the state of the world (55%), 54% of us talk about our hopes and dreams.
Nice to know we’re a nation of talkers but a happy one at that too.
Along with Nic (Planning With Kids), Maria (Mums Word) and Fi (My Mummy Daze) I was lucky enough to be invited by Macquarie Bank to a morning tea hosted by journalist, Angella Mollard to discuss the stats and what they mean to us as mothers, wives, professionals and females in general.
When it came to the topic of chores, 68% of men believe they do their fair share of the cleaning but when the women were asked, only 44% of their partners say they really do the cleaning. Hmmmm…When it came to cooking, women said they did the majority of it and funnily enough, men were in complete agreement. (Guys, listen up! We totes don’t mind if you make us some Man Spaghetti once in awhile!!!)
Because of the intimate setting and as each of us came from different backgrounds holding diverse experiences, the discussions were fluid, candid and full of perspective from all different angles.
Productive. Informative. Thought-provoking.
I actually went home and that night, made the conscious effort for Mr Surfer and I to have another heart to heart.
Because in life, having dreams and goals isn’t enough. Talking about them is taking accountability and responsibility for their fruition; it’s that one step closer to achieving them.
Renee at Mummy, Wife, Me says
We do the same in this household. Lying in bed after the kids are asleep we talk. Sometimes until the wee hours of the morning. We solve the world’s problems and ours in the wee hours of the morning 🙂
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Lisa Wood says
We miss those heart to heart talks…..too many little ears are still listening in our Motorhome for us to be able to talk at night time 🙂
But we make sure we do have a “Date Night” at least twice a month….even just to go out and have a coffee!
Love the idea of hearing about how families are set up, with who likes to do what.
In our family David does most of the cooking, and I do the cleaning!
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Neets says
Heart to hearts are so important and good for the soul! x
Neets recently posted..Balancing Family, Fitness and Fun
Martine@themodernparent says
Sounds like a great morning tea too, with some very wise women!
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Leanne Winter says
It’s so important to have the heart to hearts, isn’t it? The problem as the kids get older is that they stay up later and often by the time they’re both asleep either my hubby is asleep on the couch or I’m too tired to keep my eyes open. Not sure what the answer is – make more of an effort probably.
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Becky from BeckyandJames.com says
We used to do this. Now, my husband is too preoccupied by whatever forum he’s reading or too grumpy, so I’ve started playing candy crush and then we go to bed. I miss talking about the big stuff, the dreams, the little stuff. I might try initiating a chat tonight. Thanks for the prompt, Grace x
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Emily @ Have a laugh on me says
I completely agree! Thankfully hubby and I are on the same wavelength in regards to our finances, I think it’s one of the biggest contributors to marriage failures! Just wish we had more money to finance our dreams 🙁 x
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Nami says
Words to live by. Progressive heart to heart talks are the best. And lemme know when you’re moving to New York, lady!
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