I thought long and hard about what this week’s FYBF feature should be.
How does one ring in 2013 with a bit of sparkle?
Then, bang on New Year’s Eve, Hollywood’s power celebrity couple of the moment, “Kimye” (Kim Kardashian and Kayne West) announced that they were having a bub.
But, let’s forget the glamour and glitz for a brief moment.
It’s summer. We’re up to our upteenth attempt in toilet training the twinlets.
Spending Christmas at Grandma’s, the boys were “hanging lose” in the little waddling pool. Playing freely in their birthday suits.
Never an issue, we didn’t think we had anything to worry about.
Until, came wandering a distinct waft of poop.
Having a quick peek in the pool, there was nothing.
Just my imagination, I thought.
Alas, a minute later, brown floaties appeared.
Lucky for you guys, I didn’t take any photos.
But.
I can attest that my twin toddlers’ tummies can’t fully digest corn yet. Nor carrots for that matter.
Attempting to keep minimal damage to my MIL’s patio, Mr Surfer and I precariously drained the murky water into the adjacent garden. Scooping the drifting faeces with plastic buckets and spades, we dumped it on her pelargoniums. It’s just fertilizer, right?
Filling up the pool again, we naively thought we were in the clear. That one brown shark attack was it.
We had forgotten that behind every set of twins, there is a conspiracy theory.
With only seconds of jumping back in the pool, the other dropped his shark.
Tell you what. My MIL’s garden is going to look lush and green, albeit a little stinky.
So Kimye, hope you guys are ready for what’s in store. After all the cutesy cutesy moments and dressing up your offspring in extravagant designer clothes, get ready for sharks.
Those guys attack the rich and famous too.
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{ 46 comments… read them below or add one }
Hilarious, Grace! toilet training is not for the faint hearted, that’s for sure.
Catherine Rodie Blagg recently posted..Mama Bear and the Digger Lady
Good morning Grace!
I was going to blog about sharks today too. Although I changed my mind. They weren’t quite the same sharks you’re talking about though! LOL.
Happy Friday
Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit
x o x o
Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit recently posted..Day 1187 – I Will
Imagine Kimye scooping poop from her diamond encrusted wading pool with her perfectly manicured fingers? Nah – the help will do that.
Mumabulous recently posted..Vogue Inferiors
Oh the joys of toilet training….we’re experiencing those too with Delilah at the moment. It’s been so full-on that we just had to laugh when she decided to take off her undies and put a nappy back on! Haven’t had the ‘joy’ of brown floaties in the pool yet, but I’m sure that’s somewhere in our future too Grace….
Kirsty @ My Home Truths recently posted..Holiday Truths
Great post to start the year Grace! And ever so true x
Martine@themodernparent recently posted..I resolve not to make any New Years resolutions
I’m sure they’ll have someone else to take care of the sharks! Don’t see her being very “hands on” at all! Already feel sorry for this poor kid!
As for sharks – we had several in the bath tub I remember and I couldn’t handle it. I had to get hubby to take care of it. Hmmm, maybe I’m not much better than Kimye!
Aroha @ Colours of Sunset recently posted..Ringing In The New Year
I had my first brown shark experience with Summer last week, first time with any of my kids, not nice considering I had just pulled the plug out the bath and was racing to beat it from going down the plughole! I’m sure Kim will have the best ‘help’ for situations like this.
Alicia recently posted..Monarto Zoo
Ha ha ha! Oh, I’m so glad the toilet training days are behind me.
Not that I wouldn’t do it all again with another littley, if that was on the cards for me!
Persistence Grace, persistence.
Soon those twinlets of yours will be ‘dropping the kids at the pool’, like the rest of us.
But not a paddling pool!
xx
Tracey @ Bliss Amongst Chaos recently posted..365 Days Of Grateful – Day 3.
I laugh, but that happened to me too. My daughter in the spa nude whilst my mother and all her friends dangled their legs in the spa sipping champers. Then the cry (from the ladies started).
Mandy recently posted..Grateful for New Starts
Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water….
Cannot say we have had that lovely experience in a pool. The bath though…
Happylan recently posted..5 easy ways to find gratitude online
Oh dear. The joy of small people, hey? I guess on the upside, you weren’t in the pool with them. Have a great, “shark” free Friday!
LittleWhiteDove recently posted..Block of the Month. In theory.
Oh man… your story KILLS me! We have had many episodes of poo in the bath. In fact we have a slotted spoon just for the occasion. My sister and I know that a one word text is enough when we text ‘Slotted Spoon’… It is hilarious!
B recently posted..Life: Happy 5th Birthday Miss Z
Too funny Grace…and timely! I will have to watch out for that with my poppet in the pool today. It will be interesting to see how Kimye cope with the basics of baby raising. But I was reading yesterday that she will probably make around $15M in endorsements, so she will probably be ok!!
Simone@Life.Love.Sim recently posted..New Zealand – Rotorua, Adventure Parks & Hobbits
That kid will have it’s own line of bejewelled pooper scoopers before the third trimester! Not that I can picture Kim or Kanye using one…..
“Grace, imma let you finish, but my baby had one of the best brown sharks of all time…..”
Amanda recently posted..yet another new year post
Now that is an episode of the Kardashians I would actually watch. I don’t think she would be too in to all the crappyness (pun fully intended!) of child-rearing, I’m sure all of that will be looked after by numerous assistants and nannies off camera and only the most non-offensive of wet nappies will ever be touched by Kim’s hands. Am I being too harsh? I don’t care, she’s invited the ridicule into her life with open arms. If she didn’t want to be judged she shouldn’t pimp out her entire life.
Love your work Grace, hope your MIL’s garden is looking stunning! And happy Friday!
Kylez @ A Study in Contradictions recently posted..2012′s Top 12′s
Oh God, considering how many times my son would poop in the bath, I can feel your pain!
Love the Kimye weave into the story too! I can only imagine she will throw copious amounts of money at any issue that comes her way!
Donna @ NappyDaze recently posted..Seachanging – 3 years on…
Oh my Lord, that is way too funny!! And brings back memories of bath time with my now Miss 5 when she was a baby…..ick!
LOL! Oh dear! The joys of toilet training! I have been trying to train my 3yr old umpteen time too – its driving me crazy!
jessica recently posted..Banana Muffins with a little bit more
This gave me flashbacks to when I was little and my baby sister would release the brown smelly sharks. Rachel xx
Rachel from Redcliffe Style recently posted..Potatoes, potatoes, potatoes.
Pollywaffle in the pool!
Eww.
Cheeky scheming kidlets!
Happy new year Grace xx
Francesca recently posted..Francesca’s Festa of Favourites – January 2013
Hahaha I can’t imagine Kimmy cleaning up rogue sharks! That would be a sight for sore eyes wouldn’t it’!
Happy Friday Grace! Have a fabulous weekend hun xxx
Miss Cinders recently posted..things i know
Oh god noooooo! The horror. Yes having poo disasters is one of the great levelling aspects of parenthood. Call me crazy but I reckon Kim and kanye be paying somebody else to scoop their kids poop. Just a hunch.
SarahMac recently posted..Stye. A complaint, in verse.
I am so glad you didn’t take a photo!
I don’t handle code brown too well, it’s the husband’s domain! I run screaming like a lunatic.
xx
Kelly HTandT recently posted..Social Retardation
Haha – I’ve had the very same thing happen with my twins back in the day!
Oh dear…I think Kimmie is in for a shock when she realises that there is more to having a baby than designer baby clothes. I reckon she’ll have hired help though – so she’ll probably always be fresh as a daisy and hand bub over for the yukky parts. Hmmm… that’s a big judgemental isn’t it. She may well prove me wrong. I hope she does!
Min recently posted..Transition
Ha ha…I keep waiting for our first brown shark!
We have had a few nature poos but just in the grass…I know we will have a bath or pool poo soon!
And inevitably it will be a moment when I am on my own and I will have a Kardashian style breakdown trying to wrangle the baby and the poo!
Thank goodness I don’t have any diamond earrings otherwise I might be really overwhelmed!
Great post!
Happy 2013!
hilarious!!
Sonia @ Natural New Age Mum recently posted..Do a daily body boost and brush with me!
Oh dear! This is the second poo post I have come across today. They do make me giggle a little. Thankfully my poo experiences are rather limited. Good luck with the toilet training. Fairy wishes and butterfly kisses
Rhianna recently posted..2013 The Year of ?
I don’t want to know what the brown things in their buckets are…..
EssentiallyJess recently posted..The Mandatory 2012 Recap Post
Great post. Thanks for the laugh. We havn’t started toilet training yet, but I am anticipating a lot of ‘sharks’ out of water when we do. Oh the joys.
Ang recently posted..Wordless Wednesday – I am Woman
Kimye will be fine – they’ll change a few nappies for the cameras, then pose for a few soft-focus black and white photos, then hand bubs off to one of countless nannies. Then tweet about the difficulties and dramas of parenting.
Sorry, I’m not usually so cynical! Good luck to them. And I hope your shark attack days are over. Happy new year Grace x
Emily recently posted..Childhood memories can be recast by new discoveries
Ha ha! Great post Grace. They live in another world those shiny people with conjoined names don’t they? Happy new year
Lara @ This Charming Mum recently posted..What’s your most memorable New Year’s Eve?
OMG hon, you never fail to remind of all those moments I will have to deal with when I finally attain some grandchildren. So thanks. I was blissfully ignorant for a good few moments until now. LOL!
Hope the garden recovers soon!
xxXOoo
carmen recently posted..New Year, New Friday…
Lol Grace!
We’re toilet training too….
Poor Kimye… And poor Baby Kimye!
Happy Poo Year to you!
Robomum recently posted..Thanks Blog! Love, Me X
Ha ha brilliant, i found a couple of little presents on my rug this morning accompanied by some oh oh’s as well! X
rhian @melbs recently posted..Back to the future (or Happy New Year)
Oh that’s hilarious!
They do say that twins are “double trouble”…
Janet recently posted..What Men Want …
Oh dear, we haven’t had one of those for a while… but did I ever tell you about my wee girl’s poo smearing and carpet rubbing??? Oh dear, oh dear. Say no more.
I have been down coast where net access wouldn’t work at all and just got back today. It was good in fact but I’m SO LATE to link up. Bugger!!
And I had my NY resolutions scheduled so they were posted but NO COMMENTS, heartbroken, heartbroken I tell you.
Seana Smith recently posted..Beetroot, Banana and Pineapple Smoothie – No Seriously
Had a good giggle at that one Gracie! God forbid that happens to me. Girls only just went into their big girl beds tonight (2 minutes ago) and we’re up to ten put-back-to-beds so far. Took me a while to write this comment too lol
Penny recently posted..Animal Touch: Get more hands-on this year!
Oh that is too funny!! Plenty of sharks about in the Db household too! Somehow I think Kimye might have a built in fear of sharks….
Hilarious! Toilet training is so not fun. At all. Thank goodness Ned has only ever pooped in the bath twice and never in the pool. He is awesome at poos in the toilet but wee still goes everywhere. Gross.
Once when my sister and I were bathing together when we were quite small, she got out of the bath, did a poo on the toilet and then put her hand in the dunny, picked up the poo with her bare hand then chucked it in the bath with me. I kid you not. Gross.
Vanessa @ babblingbandit.me recently posted..The BB twenty twelve retrospective: The second half
Grace, you are hilarious. The only thing worse than toilet training one kid, would be toilet training two. May the force be with you! I haven’t linked up today, in school holidays I just could not manage two posts in one day, (having posted on the AIOOW blog today). So just saying Hi and Happy New Year gorgeous lady! xx
Twitchy recently posted..Blogpost the First, 2013
Ahhh yes, the floating brown lump of icccckkkkkkkkkk. Trust me, you will be SOOOOOO happy once this toilet training business is mastered! xxx
Ah, the brown sharks! We used to get frequent shark sightings in our bath tub about a year ago, when Pebble was just two. For some reason that warm water just made things move. To this day we always avoid bathing, whenever possible, until immediately post poo LOL
Kylie @ Octavia and Vicky recently posted..One Ingredient Banana Ice Cream
Ahh, Grace!! Those brown sharks just put me off my brekkie!!
I’m loving all the comments – seems like we all have one or two poo poo stories up our sleeves
kirri recently posted..The right conditions to grow and flourish
But Kimye will have plenty of other people to go fishing for them. 2012 was Year of the Random Poo in my family. I lost count of how many I had to pick up off the ground, out of the pool and out of undies. But now the 3 year old is all grown up, I am looking forward to much less poo in 2013
Rachel @ The Kids Are All Right recently posted..Mum’s iPhone for teenager – too many strings attached?
Hahaha I laughed and laughed at your sharks Grace…. Since I’m past all that, UNTIL I had to dust off the old potty this morning to collect two lots of shark samples for my baby girl this week, made more delightful by the fact that this needs doing in the first place. Where is my hired help????????
Kim@FallingFaceFirst recently posted..New year, in clover.
This post gave me a big belly laugh! I needed that – thank you twinlets
Becc recently posted..Welcome 2013!
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